Silhouetta
by Leviathan's Dirge
Summary: “Lily, don’t…” He held his arm out to her. “Please, can’t we… I just want… Please…” Snape just wanted to hold her in his arms. He didn’t want to lose her. Implied SnapexLily But it doesn't turn out that way at all.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Harry Potter, nor am I remotely English.

**A/N: **This is finally finished! Oh my god! It was started on December 22nd, which was actually the day that my Uncle passed away. For many reasons, including both the deaths of my Uncle and grandfather, I have put this away. Still, I am happy about how this turned out, it took me quite some time to finish. Hope you like it too!

~**Dirge**

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The night was still young; the sun had just gone down. In its place stood a bright silhouette against a pale abyss. All in all, it was absolutely gorgeous, just like she was. Actually, it would be the perfect time to confront her; he had to take is future into his hands. And when was there a better time to do such a thing than right then?

"Hello, Lily." He was smiling, but also showing signs of caution. She was in love with James, after all. And he didn't need that, not another hassle. It would be best if he could steal her heart slowly, to suck it out of her. "It's a beautiful night, isn't it?"

She nodded her head, nonchalantly. He was just a friend, which caused no need to acknowledge him, at least not in the way that he was hoping for. Severus had grown up so fast, it was almost frightful. One minute he was a beaming, hopeful little boy, who had never harmed anybody, and the next minute, he's a towering 6-foot Slytherin who would rip out anybody's throat who got to close No, a simple hello and a small smile would do nicely. And Lily knew exactly what he was getting at, so it wasn't going to work. Best to act cheerful, however, "Hello, Severus." She was airing on the side of caution.

He gulped, looking up at the stars as if they were prognosticators. He really needed, and wanted, a miracle. He just had to have her, at least one date. But it didn't seem that she was even paying him any attention, not even 5 seconds of her time. It took him a few moments to figure out, but it seemed as if she didn't even want him near her at all. He very much needed help, but he had no idea who to turn to. Besides, he had gotten this far, hadn't he? He at least needed to try. One measly shot wouldn't kill him, but overkill might get on her nerves. He'd just have to take it slowly, that was all.

"That one on the far right reminds me of you." He smirked upon seeing Lily blush slightly, but still, she didn't speak. Snape mentally slapped himself; he should've taken another approach; now he was in waist-deep water, with no way out but a paddle that had broken in half. And his boat was destroyed, too, because of his first attempt at conversation. He'd have to face the music, or he'd drown in a sea of self-pity. Well, perhaps that would be better for Lily.

"Do you mean that ugly, fat-ish one?" She questioned, in complete disgust. First he had tried flirting with her, and now he was insulting her? Maybe James was right, maybe Severus really was just one big jerk. "That's incredibly rude, Severus. I would've expecte-"

"No, no!" The Slytherin threw up his arms in defense. "That's not at all what I meant! Here, I'll show you." He took a step closer to her, and felt his heart skip a beat. He had never been so close to her before, he could feel the warmth radiating off of her skin. She however, was not at all pleased with such close proximity, and had he inched a hair closer, she might have just lost it.

"Right there, next to the one that you were referring to," he pointed. She cast her eyes up to where he was pointing; the star was so beautiful that she envied it right from the first glance. How could she possibly be that beautiful? Did Severus really mean what he said? Suddenly, she had the urge to cry, just for no apparent reason at all. Lily looked up at the star once again, finally succumbing to her senses. Snape raised an eyebrow in confusion. Why was she balling? Was it something that he had done?

"What's wrong?" Lily shook her head; did she not want to speak of it? "Is there something wrong? Do you need something?" She shook her head again, but this time, she looked furious. Why would she be furious? Surely he hadn't done anything that would offend such a marvelous beauty. At least, he hoped not.

"It's really nothing, Severus. I just used… I had a knack for always sneaking out of bed to go stargazing, but I was a horrible racket. My mother would almost always wake up, and now that I think about it, she probably never did get much sleep. It's a good thing that I stopped at 11." She coughed, attempting to stop the tears that were freefalling down her cheeks. "I used to tell her that I wanted to go stargazing, but that she could come along. Sometimes I just miss home so much; it hurts to even think about." He nodded, understanding exactly what she felt. He had been in the same situation before, just, he wasn't crying. He was actually very relieved. Maybe that's where they differed. "I need to stop this, right now. I can't be a baby." Lily laughed coldly to herself.

"It's okay. We all get depressed sometimes. Think of it this way, at least your parents are still alive. I've got nobody, no family; and nothing to call my own." Snape really meant what he had said, his parents were dead, and nobody wanted him. He was a stray, but instead of being domesticated, he was a tomcat, ready to take on the world, with nothing but his wand and his reputation. What he hadn't realized, was that he had compared apples and oranges. She was a peach, soft to the touch, and sweet. You could break her if you spoke the wrong words. He, on the other hand, was an apple; hard and bitter if you grabbed the wrong one. He had a hard core, and he was almost unbreakable. Somehow, they balanced each other out perfectly, but she still didn't agree.

"So, by all means, go and feel sorry for yourself!" She screamed, unexpectedly as it was. "You're a Slytherin; we don't share a common bond. Why don't you understand me? We're different!"

"But we're still the same. Try to understand what I would do, if I was ever forced upon your position. I would move on!" He was pleading with her now.

"And that's what makes us different." Her glare must've lasted for 10 minutes, only in reality; it was probably only a few seconds. "You're absolutely heartless; the kind of person that kicks puppies for entertainment. You've set yourself down the wrong path, Severus. It's time you do something about it. Save yourself."

He stood, mouth agape, unable to believe that he had just been told off. Not by Lily, not by Lily. He felt as if he just wanted to crawl up into a ball and die. But in reality, his life was to be its own death sentence.

"I'm sorry," she continued, "but I have to go."

"Lily, don't…" He held his arm out to her. "Please, can't we… I just want… Please…" Snape just wanted to hold her in his arms. He didn't want to lose her to an asshole like James.

"I can't Severus. I won't. James wouldn't like it, and to tell you the truth, neither would I. It would be cheating. I'm not that kind of girl."

"But nobody would ever have to know! James wouldn't need to know!" Snape was desperately trying to convert her to his side. Truth be told, Lily didn't need to be converted. She was packed tight into James' corner. But Snape would always hold a special place in her heart, like someone who could've been. She shook her head 'no', and that was her final answer.

"I… I'm not that kind of girl, Severus." Her eyes were begging him to leave her be. "I don't want to. How would you like it if I was cheating on you? You would hate it, you'd feel terrible. Just leave me alone!"

Snape let his head down; there was no point in arguing with her. He'd just have to find another girl to ask to the Yule Ball. "At least let me walk you back to your dormitory." He tried to reason with her.

"Nope, I can walk by myself thanks." She smirked cheerfully, thankful that he had gotten the message. "Besides, people might get the wrong idea." Suddenly, without a moment's hesitation, Lily tiptoed over and kissed him right on the cheek. "You've always held a special place in my heart. Just remember that."

Taking small steps away from him, Lily couldn't believe what she had done. But it had to be done. Judging by Snape's reaction, he wasn't about to do anything drastic anytime soon. "See you later, Severus." She waved to him before turning around and running back into Hogwarts.

As for Snape, he was left standing there, like a statue, with his hand on his face.

"…" He couldn't think of the words to say. And for the first time in his young life, Snape didn't know what to do.

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If you don't understand the title, just ask. I'm not expecting everybody to understand. Just think about it for a while.

Hint. It has something to do with a silhouette and a female. Hmm


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